


Need someone.

by fxlminare



Series: THE 100 COLLECTION [22]
Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Businessman Murphy, F/M, Song: Please (Noah Kahan), Songfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-19
Updated: 2020-11-19
Packaged: 2021-03-09 17:39:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,621
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27630113
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fxlminare/pseuds/fxlminare
Summary: "Murphy x fem!reader based on the song Please, by Noah Kahan?"
Relationships: John Murphy (The 100)/Reader
Series: THE 100 COLLECTION [22]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2111010
Kudos: 3





	Need someone.

I got into my hotel room, looking at the calendar and counting the days till I could go back home and make it all right, to go to Y/N's door and ask her to forgive me for leaving her like that, for not being back home with her enough, for thinking I could make this work on my own. I had done so many things wrong, I hoped she could forgive me. No; I knew she could forgive me for no one had a heart like hers but I was terrified she'd give up on us, even if holding no grudges against me.

I had been thinking for a couple of weeks that I couldn't do this anymore and, as I woke up that morning, I knew I couldn't keep doing it; I couldn't keep going like that. I was tired of this, of driving to a place that I hated to meet people I couldn't stand; the money was good but I knew it wasn't worth it. It wasn't worth the pain in my chest every time Y/N's name was mentioned even if they weren't referring to her, when I saw her on my social media or when friends texted me about her. I saw her in my dreams even when I was wide awake and I knew she wasn't there. I thought I was going crazy. So I did what I had to do. I wanted her, I was desperate for her to take me back. It was painful.

As I was driving back to my hotel that late afternoon, having been stuck in traffic for well over two hours but feeling a bit more hopeful for the future, the radio started playing a song Y/N loved and that she had shown me months ago; it got me thinking of a better time, days where all I knew was being by Y/N's side, waking up next to her, kissing her and making love before breakfast, dancing around the apartment as she sang at the top of her lungs, thinking I couldn't have fallen in love with anyone better, with someone so loving and caring, so ready for trouble but always looking out for me, someone that had loved me so deeply without conditions. And I was so afraid I had messed it all up.

A knock on the door brought me back from the vicious circle that my thoughts had become, thanking that room service was so fast in this place, walking towards the door and putting on the room's robe not to met whoever was on the other side just in my sweats, opening the door and already thanking them for their quick service when I went mute as I saw her: Y/N.

\- "Hi, John."

She smiled, a shy and small smile as I stood there like an idiot; she had taken me completely by surprise, wondering if she could read my thoughts for I had been wanting her to see the mess I had become away from her, to see how thinking of her kept me up at night and how I couldn't function without staring at our pictures in my phone.

\- "Is it a bad time?"

\- "No, no." -I came out of my trance as I heard the sorrow in her voice and her beautiful face taken over by worry- "Come in, please."

I opened the door fully for her, allowing her to come inside with her little bag, wondering if she was going somewhere else and this was just a stop in the way or if I was her destination. I had so many questions and so many things I wanted to say as I closed the door and followed her inside, but I could only stare at her, taking in how beautiful she looked, allowing my heart to beat faster for how much I had missed her.

\- "Were you expecting someone else?"

\- "I've just ordered dinner."

\- "Oh, okay. I can come back later..."

\- "Stay." -I was in front of her in less than it took me to beg her- "Please."

She nodded, leaving her bag on the floor and looking around; the room was not messy for the people that worked here had tidied it up, thankfully. My clothes from the day were on the side of the bed I didn't sleep in, my shoes in the middle of the room and the TV on some random channel with some old movie, I guessed. Y/N's eyes found mine again and all I wanted to do was hold her to my chest and kiss her and apologize but I wasn't sure what she wanted.

\- "I've missed you, Y/N, so much."

\- "I'm glad." -she chuckled, the tension and awkward silence starting to dissipate- "You wonder why I'm here."

\- "I hope it's for me." -I rubbed the back of my neck- "Not with bad news."

\- "No, no. Everything's okay back home."

She nodded, looking around again and I felt like an idiot, inviting her to sit down at the table to the side, pulling the chair in for her and sitting down in front of her, starting to sweat under the heavy robe but not wanting to take it off for her. I turned off the TV, focusing all my attention on her, my mind unable to shut up and going over all the things that could go wrong.

\- "I miss you, John, I really do."

\- "There's a but, right?" -I smiled but I wasn't happy, it was bittersweet hearing her say those words in that tone; I only wanted this pain to go away.

\- "There is." -she sighed- "I wished there was something I could do to... I don't know, this was so much easier in my head."

\- "I..." -I licked my lips- "Can I be honest with you?"

\- "Please."

\- "I want you, Y/N, there's nothing I want more in this life than to be yours and be by your side. It drives me crazy being away from you, it's like I'm weak without you and I'm just so tired of pretending following this path is what I want, this path that I thought for so long was my dream when, in reality, all I dream about it you."

I couldn't believe I had found words to explain it, and maybe it wasn't it all and maybe it didn't make complete sense but I was so relieved I had finally spoken it out loud to her, fearing her reaction but knowing now there was nothing I could do about it, having put all my cards on the table. And, if she still wanted to move on, at least she'd know how I felt.

\- "But you're here." -she shook her head as if she couldn't find the words- "You still have to stay for two more weeks."

\- "I quit this morning and went to the station to get a ticket home, but today's train was full so I bought one for tomorrow morning." -I felt so stupid- "And now you're here to tell me this is over."

\- "I'm not here to end things between us."

\- "You... aren't?"

\- "No." -she chuckled, standing up and coming towards me- "I came to tell you that I miss you and the 'but' is that I hate not having a steady home. So, I miss you but I hate that you travel so much from place to place that you can't settle and find a home. I don't like it, I want a place to call mine, ours, to have a key to a place together and call it home." -I took her hands in mine- "Unless until I realized my home now is not a place, it's wherever you are. I wanna be with you." -she chuckled- "That's why I'm here."

\- "You packed light."

\- "Because I wasn't sure how you'd feel about it."

I stood up, taking her face in my hands and kissing her, her lips on mine and her arms around me as she kissed me back were all I needed to feel strong again, to feel like I could do anything, to wake up from my nightmare and start dreaming with us again. All I wanted was to know that my stubbornness hadn't cost me her love, that I hadn't lost her.

\- "I love you, Y/N, you're my home."

\- "I'm really glad to hear that." -she chuckled as I pulled her up, her legs around my own as I walked to the bed and sat on it with her straddling my lap- "I'm sorry I didn't pick up the phone."

\- "I thought you were done with me."

\- "I was afraid you were calling to end it all because you were happy like this."

\- "Y/N, when you're not with me I'm a mess."

\- "I can see that." -she looked around- "This place is not that messy."

\- "Thank room service. If you had come this morning you'd have seen the mess I made because I couldn't sleep."

\- "A mess?" -she rose a playful eyebrow my way.

\- "Not that mess, that was this morning." -I chuckled as she pretended to be grossed out- "I'm so glad I haven't lost you."

\- "What are we going to do now? You've quit and I'm here."

\- "Where do you wanna live?"

\- "I can choose?" -I nodded, running my thumb over her cheek- "Anywhere in the world?"

\- "Anywhere in the world."

\- "Okay, then I choose..." -she leaned in, her lips just over mine as she pushed me on the bed, her hands next to my head as I settled my own on her back, pulling her to me as she kissed me, feeling the happiest man alive after she whispered her final words- "Wherever you are."

**Author's Note:**

> **.Feedback, please.**  
> 


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